Double Dragon

We're starting 2014 being idiots. You see, sometime around new year's eve our lamp in the living room went dark. Poof - gone. And no spare light bulbs in the house. Well, I tried ordering some from the local supermarket, but the delivery monkey had the great idea to substitute the one I ordered with a different one, for a different socket.

They've also substituted egg nog with peanut butter, because fuck me.

I think he was more or less trying to tell me to just buy a different fucking lamp to match the bulb he delivered instead of the one I ordered.

So we finally went out to the shop today to get a replacement bulb. I screwed it into the lamp, applied a little too much force and broke it. This was also the moment where I realized that the lamp was unplugged. Because, you know, lizard walking around the house, not giving a fuck about my lamp and shit. So I've spent the next ten minutes digging through the trash looking for the old bulb I assumed was broken. Which was a little disgusting, but still better than walking all the way back to the shop to buy yet another one. Sigh.

On a happier note, our Warframe "clan" finally had its emblem approved and patched into the game. It's a time and money-consuming process only a complete idiot (read: me) would undergo. You see, every clan (or 'guild' for you MMORPG people) can represent their members with a little holographic emblem shown on characters. If you've ever played any incarnation of Counter-Strike, you'll know that giving people the possibility to upload images of any kind will always and inevitably result in penis. Let people create images with in-game tools like on Call of Duty - penis again.

And then they call everyone else fags. If only they knew how to google irony...

So if you want a clan emblem on Warframe, you need to have it approved first. Well, actually, there's also the matter of paying cash shop currency worth 10 Dollars up front. Like so:

150 Platinum equals ten Bucks. Wanna make changes? Ten Bucks again!

So first you pay them for the privilege to upload stuff, then they'll let you know whether or not they approve of your emblem. If they don't, they'll let you know in an email, but you won't get your money back. If they do approve, however, they'll upload it straight away. Actually...

Time between request for approval and upload for our emblem: Two weeks.

This is so bad and so wrong, it's badong. If you don't get that reference, fucking watch Kung Pow, maggot! But since we've got more money than common sense around here, I've stolen some copyright-free image off some ancient Angelfire website and edited a bit to my liking.

Clan emblem wot I done.

We named our clan Double Dragon, because it really just consists of Claire and myself. There's a nice, ragey red dragon and a mellow blue dragon and if you can't guess who is who, you're an idiot. Double Dragon wasn't just fitting because we're only two people and everyone likes dragons and shit. Warframe is about Cyber Ninjas in space and the original Double Dragon was not. But it's a beat 'em up game with martial arts and stuff. Also, the main characters in the Double Dragon games fight side by side, but they're also rivals. At least that's what I deduct from the fact that player 1 and player 2 have to fight to the death at the end of the game and the winner gets to make out with the girl. Manipulative bitch! They're also siblings and we're not, because that'd be gross, and we're not main storyline characters on Game of Thrones.

Anyhow. Took a while, what with the whole approval process requiring an actual human being, which happened to be celebrating Christmas and what have you, but they've finally patched our fucking emblem into the game. Behold:

For ten bucks, I still shoulda been allowed to put my erect penis on there.

So now we can properly represent our epic 2 person clan in-game and people can freak out. OMFG Y U SO KEWL? And we're like haha noob. Or something. I don't know.
Fuck.
I just realized I forgot to get bread when I bought the light bulb. What am I supposed to do with all that free peanut butter now, which should have been egg nog in the first place? Argh!

-Cat