My penis is of average length and sports a rather impressive diameter. It is uncut and bent to the right by about 3 degrees. You probably didn't care for that sort of information. Oddly enough, many religious people strongly believe that god cares.
I wonder how that would even work. Imagine, a couple decades from now, Sir Elton John or maybe Tom Cruise guarding the gates of heaven. I mean, if god really hires somebody for that kind of thing, why not hire somebody who enjoys it, right? And then there's this poor, confused, newly-deceased guy approaching the gates. Let's call him Mr. Johnson, because that's funny.
Tom Cruise: "Penis, please!"
Mr. Johnson: "What? Where am I?"
TC: "Everything will be explained to you in time. May I see your penis, please."
J: "What? What's going on here? I was driving with my wife and kids and then this huge firetruck was heading towards us! What happened?"
TC: "Yes, tragic. I need you to drop your pants, sir."
So Mr. Johnson finally does as he is told, Tom Cruise gives him a quick inspection, then mumbles something into his headset. "I got another uncut one... mhm... yes... uh huh... right."
He inhales deeply and lets out a frustrated sigh. "Yes, you can put your pants back on now. One of our staff members will take care of you in a minute. Ah, there he is!"
And as the confused man pulls up his trousers, he sees a horned little demon approaching. You know, leathery wings, red skin, maybe he comes with a pitchfork and hooves and all that crap you imagine when you think of devils. And he grabs Mr. Johnson's arm and drags him off with supernatural strength. "Come on, unclean one. We have a special place in hell, just for freaks like you!"
Tom Cruise turns the other way, ignores the kicking and screaming, closes his eyes and quietly reflects on what he just saw. Tragic!
I have asked a Muslim friend about this whole circumcision deal and he told me it's done to remind us of our mortality. You know, cut off a piece, make us bleed, show us we're weak and fragile, life is precious, that kinda thing. Maybe that's how his parents explained it to him, maybe that's the official version, I don't know. I'm too lazy to google it. But let's go with his story for a bit - why do they have to remove a piece of your wang, of all things? Why not cut something that grows back, like a toenail? How the fuck did they come up with that whole thing? Did some proud parent inspect their newborn baby, then furrowed their brow and thought, 'wait a minute, this isn't perfect'? *snip* Aaaah! There we go! And by that logic, do all women automatically go to hell?
Of course there's also a non-religious explanation to all this: Hygiene. Right. If you're reading this blog right now, then there's a pretty good chance you live in a country where the nearest shower is less than 50 feet away from you. I'm not entirely sure what those hygiene freaks think I do all day with my uncut wang. Tenderize steaks? Bash my dick against them over and over again until the beef is all nice and flat and soft? Yeah, you wouldn't want blood and steak bits caught underneath that nasty foreskin. Maybe I'm gonna use my cock to bake a cake! You know, put some flour, eggs, butter and sugar in a pot and fuck the whole thing until the dough is ready. You'd probably want to be circumcised for this, so you don't get nasty crumbs everywhere.
Naturally, the other side of the fence is equally ridiculous. Apparently, some people are so crushed by the loss of their foreskin, they crave foreskin regeneration. There are whiny teenagers on internet forums, who claim they've been mutilated, raped even, because they got circumcised as babies. Because it's such a fucking huge deal and having a bit of skin cut off when you're too young to realize what is happening is just as awful as having someone screwing you against your will. Ouch. And why do I even know that some kids whine about that kind of thing on the internet? Well... I'm one creepy fucker.
-Cat
Well, hygiene it is, for me, and the sheer insanity that is the human mind.
AntwortenLöschenCircumcision is old...it dates back to times where there weren't any showers near peoples' PCs. One, there were no PCs at all, two, no showers either. Tough luck.
If you are of the experimental kind, I strongly encourage you to adopt a more archaical style of living, that is: engage in physically demanding tasks like raising cattle, hunting game and waging wars with crude - but sharp - metal implements. Do all that without ever changing your clothes unless they are about to rot off your body, stay away from soap products and clean yourself only in bodies of water used as a toilet by a whole tribe of fellow humans.
Chances are - if none of the strenous and ultimately dangerous activities end your stint on the mortal coil - that eventually, your penis will fester and boil because stuff accumulates underneath your foreskin.
Eventually, some clever people noted that Frank B. Caveman had a really short foreskin and his penis was, in fact, not becoming a hotbed for every disease imaginable. So someone, eventually, must have said "hey, cutting off that useless piece of skin might be a good idea. Bring me a lowest-class boy so that I might put this theory to the test. Ah hell, bring me fifty, no reason to take chances.
Then, most of these boys did, in fact, not perish in extreme agony from ulcerating penises.
Eventually, religion chimed in. Desperate to prove that everything is a higher being's grand design, they retconned the circumcision (literally, think retcon like Marvel/DC) to be ordained by a higher being or principle.
Times change, science marches on, mankind develops (arguably). Nowadays, the original reason for removing the foreskin does no longer apply. Religion only ever changes if it is forced to, and because circumcision is not really harmful in the long run, it just stayed.
So there. Basically, people circumcise their newborn for reasons no longer valid, with archaic reasoning, because they are humans, and humans as a collective are too stupid to be stupid enough to finally wipe themselves out and spare the rest of creation their inane habits.